In the past around New Years I have always posted a More and Less blog about what I hope to eliminate in my life in the coming year and what I want to replace it with. You can read last years here and this years here.
Lately I have been noticing something that irks me.
Mostly in myself .
Self inspection is somewhat annoying to me because
usually always this means I have to change. And really, change isn't always an easy process for me so much. But I am going to try my darnedest with this one. And now I have accountability. "Greater is He that is in me than he who is in the world", right?
So here we go.
Today I start with the Less because I want to end on a positive and uplifting note today!
I am off of it for 6 weeks.
See tomorrow's post about that
I asked God yesterday while changing the laundry what needed to change in the way I was speaking (right after a momentary tiff with John). I have a bit of a mouth problem but am at a loss at how to change it.
Well within seconds this is how it went down as I thought about some
things I've caught myself saying lately...
"I'm always going to do this.."
"My child will never.."
"People who_________ are__________"
"If I ever...."
And this little 10 second convo took place:
Holy Spirit: "Really, Missy?! What if you just happen to be "one of those people" someday.
Do you like the taste of your own words?"
Me: "no, sir, I don't"
Holy Spirit: "Can you always predict what will happen in the future and what if you can't control everything about your situation or what your child tries to do?"
Me: "message received, loud and clear"
Holy Spirit:"Try speaking My words and try resting in my plans. Follow MY ways. They're higher. You won't be let down. It takes the pressure off. Let me help. Take it one day at a time and take a chill pill while you're at it"
Now. I'm a planner . Some could call say I am a controler.
I'm all about knowing what I am about and what I am not about.
And I'm pretty good at expressing my point of view and feelings about things. In a world where everyone either trying to very hard to conform or working so hard at not conforming that they fall into yet another stereotype, it's hard to find the balance! I don't want to be an extremist! Extreme for Jesus and that's all- I'm going to work on that too...
Too much expression of Missy's thoughts though, can just be redundant and pointless (maybe like this post??). And if people are listening to my all-inclusive umbrella statements, it could really project crazy expectations on them. What if they are "those people" some day or have a moment of "those people"-ness? I've already expressed how I feel about it, so maybe it could make them feel pre-judged. That's not at all what I want!
Always talking about how I feel is dumb. Sometimes you need a sounding board. Sometimes you need to get perspective by sharing thoughts.
Somedays you need a listening ear.
But always expressing your feelings=not always wise.
Which I've done a lot of.
This brings me to my next point..
It would be weird if I just talked a lot about how I don't want to talk as much and express MY views on everything at this point unless it's needed and helpful so... this is me being silent
Oh just kidding.I couldn't be quiet for long .
Here's the more
I've been working on this one for a couple of years. We don't have kids. We don't have huge payments of any kind. We don't have family by us. We could go and do a lot more. I suppose, in the names of wisdom and frugality, we are trying to limit our spending. However, I need to realize this does not limit my fun.
Neigh, it only increases the need for more creativity [which I love].
So here's to spontaneous trips, baking a cake at 10 PM (without sugar=gross), and trying new things without making huge inclusive statements, eating sugar and talking.
Sounds really easy.
But all things are possible in Him.
Here I go..